Time comes in many forms

Why is it that when I have all the time in the world to blog I can't bring myself to do so? I think about posting but I never sit myself down to actually do it . . . strange.

So, what is new in life lately . . . knitting projects, moving to a new apartment, that's about it. Not too exciting. Actually I just celebrated my birthday over the weekend which was if not exciting at least pleasant. I went to a Japanese style bar called Wann with the girls from school for yummy drinks and tasty snacks that were nostalgic of Japan. I had a Cassis Orange, it's classified as an izakaya (a type of Japanese bar) classic beverage and although I've never had one at an izakaya before, just at normal bars, it is indeed a very typically Japanese girly drink and made me feel right at home. We ordered several of their appetizer items but my favorites were probably the tatsutaage, marinaded deep fried chicken, and the Brie cheese tempura with a raspberry soy sauce dipping sauce - oh so delicious! On a side note, the bartender was really cute. In the following days I also got taken to brunch - one of my favorite meals - and to dinner by various other friends. So, basically I had a weekend of eating and since I love all things food related that was quite alright by me.

I won't tell you how old I am after this birthday but in a conversation with my friend Rena I was told that I can now officially be said to be pushing 30. I don't think I like that, not that I have anything against being 30, but it's just that I still feel like I'm very much in my mid-20s. Age is really just a number though and I should pay it no heed.

Other things . . . I now have in my possession the final book in the Harry Potter series. I'm both excited and sad about it. I'm eager to read about the continuing adventures of Harry and his friends but it's sad knowing that this is the last book and that there will be no more after it. The same sadness has accompanied the last volume of other series too, such as the Anne of Green Gables books, The Chronicles of Narnia, the adventures of the Swallows and Amazons, and The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Obviously I can read the books again but I'll never have the same feeling as the first time I read them, that feeling of anticipation, of slowly pushing forward line by line into the yet unknown realm of fiction. I can't bring myself to start reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows just yet. It'll sit on my bedside table for a little while longer while I savor this feeling of ending and resolve myself to it.

And on that note of ending, a goodnight to you all.

Apologies

It's been so long since I posted. Have no fear, I survived my final exam week and completed my papers, although not in an entirely timely manner . . . So, what have I been doing the past 3 weeks if all my school work has been completed? Well, work at the yarn shop has been keeping me pretty busy . . . daydreaming of all the knitting projects that I now almost have time for. I was also on a short trip back to Michigan attending a family wedding. So pretty, so lovely. And now I'm back in Seattle, the days since my return have been so eventful. Yesterday I went to a Mariners game (such fun!) and today I went to a movie after work! Am I spoiling myself? Perhaps, but don't we all need to be a little spoiled every now and again?

Oh dear . . .

I've really done it this time. Paper due tomorrow, nowhere near done . . . oh pooh. What to do, what to do. How did my procrastination get this bad? Not even that, I feel like my paper writing skills in general have decreased exponentially. It's as though that portion of my brain, the portion with paper writing knowledge stored away in it, took a terrible tumble and is now all bent out of shape past recognition. Will I pull an all-nighter? Ugh. I so don't want to but what else can I do . . .

I can't even stress eat because there isn't any food around. I've been so busy I haven't had time to go grocery shopping. This is my life? How pathetic and sad.

I'm still here

I'm just not posting because I am yet again caught in the midst of paper writing hell, well perhaps hell is an exaggeration . . . for now. It's finals week and I have a paper to write and after tomorrow evening will also have exams to grade. I've already done my usual share of procrastinating so now I'm buckling down to work . . . a rare occurrence I know *smile*

I'll be back soon with lots more time to post once classes are over with for the summer. And I promise I'll have lovely and enthralling things to say . . . probably not but at least more amusing than whining about paper writing, right?

For now let me leave you with this, after a week of gloriously warm and sunny days we've had a day or so of rain. Rain that was completely satisfactory in every way. There were big droplets of rain that I could hear hitting the bamboo leaves outside the window as I read and the thunder was rumbling in the distance. Perfection.

Anticipating summer

Today was just beautiful. Blue skies without a cloud to be seen and temps in the low 80s. The faint scent of flowers on the gentle breeze blowing across campus. Everyone is sitting out on the lush green grass of the quad reading or talking. On my way to class this morning I ran into the girls and we went for bubble tea (actually I was skipping out on the errands I was supposed to be running before class but whatever, I never just run into the girls on campus so it was a little treat). Then a grueling six hours of class later, I finally get outside again and it's still lovely. I love that days are so long in the summer. But the weather being so nice is going to make these last two weeks of school really hard, longing to be lazy in the sun while needing to get lots of work done. Oh how I long for summer break . . .

Hello Star Wars

So, just a random note to say that I keep seeing this kid walking around campus in full Stormtrooper get up. Actually I didn't know it was a kid necessarily except for the fact that I saw him without his head/helmet on today. The nice and yet bizarre thing about college campuses is that you can be wearing and doing just about anything and people won't give you a second glance. So, Stormtrooper around campus is seemingly totally normal. Of course, it's not really normal but that's besides the point. What I want to know is why anyone would decide to walk around in costume for no apparent reason? Especially in the weather we've been having lately, it's not very costume conducive. It was pouring rain the first couple times I saw him and today it was too warm to be comfortable in Stormtrooper gear . . . probably why he took off the helmet. I guess I should give him props for his dedication to costume wearing . . . a round of applause for the Stormtrooper?

Yes, it's only Tuesday

How is it still only Tuesday?! I feel like I'm coming off a week of Thursdays that never amount to a Friday! There is too much work and too little time . . . I'm drowning in work. Even as I type that though I am in fact procrastinating, oh pooh. I have an entire book to read before tomorrow morning and numerous other articles that need to be read but am I doing any of those things? Of course not. However in the past 5 hours since I got out of class, when I should have been reading, I got all of these things done:

1. Bought my ticket back to Michigan in June
2. Paid 2 bills
3. Made and ate dinner
4. Completed my remaining financial aid paperwork
5. Wrote 2 important e-mails to professors that I'd been putting off for the past week
6. And last but not least my Japanese homework (the most student-like activity and I almost forgot to put it on the list!)

And now it's time to go to bed.

To bed to bed said Sleepyhead,

Let's wait a while said Slow,

Put on the pan said Greedy Nan,

Let's sup before we go.

My grandmother used to say that to me at bedtime when I was a kid and so I say it to you now . . . to bed to bed . . .

Where will you be in 10 years?

Usually I'm quite unconcerned with age. I take it in stride that most people think that I'm several years (at times even a decade) younger than I actually am. Other peoples' age doesn't really seem an issue to me either as I have friends across the spectrum. But today I did a bit of wigging out over age, although I guess really it was more about the passage of time than age to be precise. It was a rather foolish and embarrassing freak out and in retrospect completely unnecessary but that's usually the point of wigging out, isn't it?

Why the wigging out? Well, next year is my 10 year high school reunion. In preparation for this reunion people have started to get in touch and such over the internet. This morning I had a particularly dense onslaught of internet contact with former classmates and it sort of pushed me over the edge. I've stayed in touch with an array of friends from that time but there are people that I haven't heard from or seen in quite a while. And the pictures that I see now of them and the things that they have to say about their current lives is both uplifting and bizarre.

I realize that I've progressed down a rather different path in life compared to many of them but I hadn't expected their current lives to be so alien from my own. Some are married, and some have kids, neither of which is surprising at our age but they've all aged. That really doesn't clarify anything does it? I guess what I mean to say is that they look grown up, in a way that I don't think I am. Plus there is a certain quality to memories from that adolescent time in life, as though they will always remain unchanged and in technicolor and therefore so will the people in those memories.

So many times I'm surprised by life and I guess this is no exception. When I was in high school I don't think I considered very seriously where I would be in 10 years and perhaps that is why it catches me so off guard to find that life has progressed. Although had I imagined it that would not have necessarily made me more prepared, would it? Food for thought . . .

It's all gone

Yes, it's all gone. I've chopped off my hair. The stylist at the chair next to mine came back half way through the cut looked at the hair on the floor, then at the hair still on my head, and said, "I missed the massacre!" I would prefer to call it a liberation but to each their own. It was 9 inches from my neck hairline (we measured to see if it was long enough to donate but I was an inch shy) and it all got cut off. My head feels light and airy, and free! I haven't had my hair this short, above my chin, in nearly two years and I must admit that I'm enjoying it (well at least the 2 hours since I've gotten it cut). It'll definitely be interesting to see the reactions I'll get tomorrow at work and on Monday at school. People had noticed the difference between me wearing my long hair up (a habit to get it out of the way) and down, and kept asking if I'd gotten it cut etc. What will they say when I actually get it cut, and significantly too . . .

In other news, guilty yarn purchases . . . Weaving Works was having their annual 4 day Mother's Day Sale. I had to stop in and look around. I ended up getting some yarn to knit Anna a birthday hat and some lovely Colinette Tagliatelli merino tape to knit myself a scarf (I knit one for a friend and it was so lovely I couldn't resist!). Only 3 skeins though, I was quite proud of myself. Tomorrow I'll be working at the Mother's Day Sale at Acorn Street. I've heard that it gets a little crazy but I'm looking forward to seeing all the pretty yarn on sale . . . must exert maximum amount of self restraint and not buy tons and tons of yarn.

Bunnies make me happy

I should be studying for an exam, therefore I am procrastinating and posting . . .
Just a little something that made me laugh. I was using a Japanese to English translation website a while back and when I entered the address for a certain website to be translated, I ended up on a screen with this image:


I burst out laughing, it was so unexpected and so silly. I tried to get back to the same page again but apparently I could only mis-type the web address once. But now that I've found it again, I'd like to share it with all of you because as we all know sharing is caring.

I'm sick therefore you failed your exam, not really though . . .

Being sick is the worst. I don't know what I had but I was not a happy camper yesterday. It started in the wee morning hours and lasted all day . . . and a little today too. Completely tense muscles, body temperature alternating between freezing and feverish, and all the while a pounding headache, it made for a very miserable ol' me. But the worst of it was that even when I was passed out from exhaustion I was sick in my dream too! In my dream I was an assassin and I was on a mission with my assassin buddies but because I was sick and couldn't keep up they kept on dragging me here and there and then sticking me in prickly bushes when I needed to be hidden. So unfortunate . . . and so painful. I don't know how we were assassins because really we didn't seem to have a target and were just running around a giant wilderness where other people seemed to be having a pleasant barbecue but that's dreaming for ya.

Now that I'm feeling better though, it's back to the daily grind. I have to catch up on all the work I missed while I slept yesterday. This entails grading papers . . . massive amounts of papers. Grading makes me feel like an over educated elitist . . . or maybe the kids in the class really are just painfully simple. If you're in the class I apologize, I'm sure if you have the sense to find this blog and realize who I am you're not in the portion of the class that did abysmally on the exam. But what can I say when about a third of the class didn't even answer the essay question that was posed and the other third couldn't support their argument with a shred of evidence from lecture . . . so sad, but perhaps my expectations are just too high. Or maybe being sick is making me crotchety and hence a crotchety grader.

Friends or Rock? Rock!

Life has been a little crazy lately . . . 3 jobs plus grad school is really a recipe for insanity. I have the best intentions of posting regularly and then . . . well various things get in the way. For example, I had a fully formed rant that I was going to post about Buddhism and how some Western practitioners of Buddhism subscribe to a religion they don't fully understand and how that cheapens not only Buddhism but religion as a whole - the practice of religion without full knowledge of its past and present context seems irresponsible to me, but then again I'm not a devout practitioner of any religion (precisely because I would want to be a responsible and engaged practitioner). Anyway, I was really quite peeved about the whole thing after a discussion in class and I got home all ready to type away and then I got sidetracked by paying bills (how mundane!) and forgot all about my post. So it goes.

At the moment I'm faced with a dilemma of an entirely different nature though. I just realized that a rock show that I've been planning on going to for months coincides with a friend's birthday barbecue party. So what do I do? Rock show or birthday BBQ? This wouldn't even be an issue but for the fact that the BBQ is for a particularly fickle friend - a fair weather friend who has failed to be a decent friend (let alone a good friend) time and time again. Usually I would say to myself, "Be the bigger person, don't let their treatment of you influence the type of friend you are to them." But you know what, I'm tired of that. I'm tired of being the bigger person. I want to go to the rock show - the rock never lets me down! Plus its not just any rock show, it's Tapes 'n Tapes. Now, lest you're thinking that I'm a terrible friend (or perhaps even a terrible person) let me clarify that if this were any other friend or any other band I would be choosing the BBQ party without even thinking twice. That's saying a lot coming from someone like myself who is completely indecisive and often has to think of things five, six, or seven times, not just twice.

It all comes back to light bulbs

Um, so I'm sitting in the relative dark which makes it feel like it's late at night when I usually post but it's actually mid-morning. Why am I sitting in the dark then? Well, my light fixture went kaput this morning, with fanfare no less . . . the light bulbs went out with a bang (well not quite a bang but definitely a "sss-sshh-sping-POP" that was disturbing enough for groggy ol' me). And I can't find any spare light bulbs, poop!

I also suspect that today is the day I'm getting my not-so-wonderful exam back from previous post, ick. It all makes me want to crawl under my desk with some ice cream and sulk for a bit. Moments like this makes me feel oh so disgruntled . . . and agree most wholeheartedly with this lovely caricature that my cousin Lindsey sent me.

Same old antics

Yet again it is late at night and I am studying madly for an exam that I have tomorrow. I haven't entirely done all the readings for the class and I'm not entirely sure what quality of work my professor is expecting from us all. Under these circumstances you would think that I would take this a little more seriously, but no. All I can think about is the bag of yarn that I got at work today. New projects - that's all that fills my head. For those who are curious, I got some lovely sock yarn and some other colorful yarn to make gloves, one pair as a gift and one pair for myself. I should probably rename this blog Confessions of a Procrastinating Grad Student, it would be much more on the mark. In the meantime though, I'll wait as my poor printer is printing its little heart out and daydream about knitting tomorrow after my exam is done. For now though back to studying for that exam . . .

Chocolate, oh chocolate wherefore art thou so sweet and delicious?

Keeping with the theme of chocolate goodness, I was skimming through some of my favorite on-line spots and saw this little number on Chow. A top ten list of retro candy bars across America?! Yes, it's true. I'm sad to say (and slightly surprised) that I've only had one of these confectionery delights - the Idaho Spud. The one I ate was a gift from Bethany who had visited Idaho but they can also be purchased at the local drugstore (after all Idaho is a neighboring state). I quite enjoyed the spud. Everyone else had issues with it, a dislike of marshmallow, a dislike of coconut, etc., but I thought it was . . . well, special in its very own way. The only thing to take away from the joy of my spud was Bethany telling us that she had debated between the Idaho Spuds and t-shirts that said Darth Tater . . . need I say more?

Does Michigan have a retro candy bar? For that matter does it have t-shirts with witty word play referencing Star Wars? All I can think of as strictly Michigan is Vernors (which isn't entirely true anymore), Faygo, Superman ice cream (which I'm not even sure about), and Cake Batter ice cream. Two types of soda pop and ice cream, can they really compare to a candy bar? I don't know.

Bunny!

Today, I finally broke down and started to eat the chocolate bunny I got for Easter. Perhaps "finally broke down" is slightly misleading since it's only been a couple of days since Easter but you have to understand how much self restrain I had to exercise in order to not eat it right away. As a rule I eat chocolate bunnies head first. I've stuck to this pattern since I was a child. My mother once told me the story of how when I was five or six she gave me a chocolate bunny and I immediately bit off its head. She was a little shocked, I guess she thought I would have some qualms about eating the cute bunny. Apparently when she asked me how I could be so cruel as to just bight off the bunny's head, I said, "Mommy, its not real," and gave her a look equivalent to, "Don't you know anything?" and complacently continued to eat the bunny. Very telling, isn't it?

Anna got me a Lindt milk chocolate bunny, so delectably delicious! I was going to just eat the ears but I ended up eating its whole head. Now there's a decapitated bunny sitting on my shelf. It looks a little forlorn. But look at the picture, isn't it just saying, "Eat me! Eat me!" Just like the cakes in Alice in Wonderland.

Easter, weddings, old friends, and old flames

Let's start with Easter. It is a holiday I enjoy mostly for the candy. However, it's a little tainted for me compared to other candy based holidays because of the presence of the Peep. That's right, as some of you may know, I have strong objections to Peeps (if you missed my rantings on this topic they can be found here). However, this is their holiday of origination, if you will, and therefore I feel like I should give them a break. For that matter I will even direct you to this story that I heard on Weekend America which was both revolting and intriguing - listen to the story it's amusing.

Now on to weddings, there are several that I am planning on attending this summer. They come in clusters I've noticed. The thing that is troubling is that the majority of them are people who are younger than myself. It's not an envy thing, I haven't the slightest inclination to get married at this point in time, but it is a little disturbing to one's sense of balance and order. These certainly weren't the weddings that I had anticipated on attending at this point, I thought I would be seeing people my own age getting married first. It just seems like a natural progression, at the very least I expected a variety in the age range but not so. Strange and curious.

Finally, old friends and old flames. This evening I reconnected with an old friend (an old friend who is incidentally younger than myself and getting married soon) and that is always a pleasure. In our conversation we fill in the blanks since we last saw one another. And even with the passage of time, it is so easy to fall into the same pace of conversation. I like that. Along those lines, she asked me after an old flame of mine who also happened to be a mutual friend of ours. He is another person with whom I fall easily into conversation after long intermissions. It's funny since I haven't talked about him or thought of him in those terms, as an old flame (a lovely almost antiquated turn of phrase that I find rather charming), in a long time. He has since become a good friend, as he always was, but now he is that both in reference and in actuality. And perhaps I don't talk to him as often as I should but I know he will not bear a grudge, just as I know that we'll fall so easily into conversation when we do talk again.

Growing up, much like breaking up, is hard to do

When I was eight and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up the question didn't seem quite as menacing as it does now. And even though I hate it when people ask me that question, I can't help asking other people. Does that make me a terrible person? Perhaps it's only terrible because I myself don't have an answer to that question. I grow more and more confused as to the answer as the years go by. Although one thing I have realized, it's not really what I want to be but who I want to be that's important. Jobs and careers may come and go but I will always be myself. I'm not too worried though (although perhaps I should be), I believe in serendipity, or if we want to be oh so practical we could say that I usually manage to iron things out.

When all else fails turn to music, and there's nothing like cheesy music from another decade to describe ones thoughts. I don't know why I thought of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do" perhaps because it was on a mixed CD of oldies that I had as a kid. I'd forgotten how truly cheesy the lyrics were until I looked them up online. It was perhaps an era when music was just . . . well, simpler, for lack of a better word. So I shall leave you at that . . .

Don't take your love away from me
Don't you leave my heart in misery
If you go then I'll be blue
'Cause breaking up his hard to do

And the last verse, just for kicks . . .

I beg of you, don't say goodbye
Can't we give our love another try
Come on baby, let's start anew
'Cause breaking up is hard to do

So much to do, so little time

So, another quarter has started. I've had all of my classes and all I can say is that it's going to be a doozie. Tons of books, lots of reading, and exams upon exams - which oddly enough I'm not too rankled about as I'm feeling a little burnt out on papers lately and am willing to accept anything else. This quarter I'm resolved to turn a new leaf (as I am almost every quarter) to mend my procrastinating ways and start early on all things important - no more end of quarter madness. Will I actually make these changes? It's debatable, I always have such good intentions but well . . . it clearly hasn't panned out in the past so it may not this time either but I will try and try again, I'm nothing if not optimistic.

At the moment I'm feeling a little torn between reading for class, doing taxes, and reading my new book from the library. Taxes have taken a back seat to books, after all books are much more exciting than taxes (ick!). But should I read school books or fun books? I know I should read school books but fun books are just so much more . . . fun. It's like falling off the wagon at the first bump, how did I ever expect to make it the whole ride? Clearly at this rate if I can't prioritize serious school reading I'm never going to be able to turn a new leaf and be uber productive and avoid procrastination . . . oh dear.

The problem isn't ameliorated by the fact that I'm already in the midst of three fun books which I started over spring break.
The Earthsea Quartet - My father gave me this in high school and I finally decided to commit myself to reading it. I know that sounds strange, committing oneself to reading a book, but the circumstances under which it was given to me have a lot to do with that. My father gave it to me since I had so enjoyed the Lord of the Rings trilogy and it was of a similar genre and he thought I would enjoy it also. But I decided to not read it since I was afraid that it just wouldn't be able to compete with the Lord of the Rings. This fear is born from a similar experience I had with Jane Austen and Thomas Hardy. Hardy was recommended to me by my father since I had so enjoyed Austen but when I read Hardy, not long after I had whisked through several Austen novels, he just put me to sleep. In retrospect I may have not given Hardy as much of a chance as I ought but there it is, I wasn't impressed upon first trial. Anyway my point is that I didn't want to have that same experience with LeGuin and thought that perhaps a break from the genre altogether might be beneficial. Little did I anticipate that break to be years upon years. So, The Earthsea Quartet came back from Japan with me over winter break but I didn't even start reading it until a month ago - this is the sad state of affairs around here.
Persepolis - Note to Sherry: I can just imagine your exasperation, I know, I know. I'm finally reading it. It got buried under so many other books that it really didn't have a fighting chance until now. Besides, in comparison to The Earthsea Quartet this pace is downright speedy!
Time Was Soft There - I haven't gotten very far in this yet so I'm not entirely attached. But it sounded so lovely on the staff recommendation card at the bookstore that I was suckered into finding it at the library. It's about a bookstore in Paris called Shakespeare & Co., a store which I just fell in love with when I was there. It is the epitome of the bookstores that I daydreamed of as a child, scruffy around the edges, vast while being compact, and it is as much a visual feast as it is a literary one. Of course, the fact that it's on the banks of the Seine just across from Notre Dame doesn't hurt either. On a tangential note, how many kids daydream about old scruffy bookstores? What an odd child I was.

Do you see my dilemma? They're so fun . . . or at least full of the promise of fun. How could I decided between these three books and school books, let alone the new book that I got at the library today?

Have you been dreaming lately?

Just two notes from my dreams of late . . .

1. I'm stuck in an octagonal toaster and can't get out
2. The cheeky nerve of bananas only being sold in bunches but when I yank them apart because I want all my bananas to be individual fruit they reattach themselves!

Dreams are weird . . .